How to deal with a break-up?

you guys are going to think i am so effed up. i am dating a guy right now, two months ago a boyfriend of five years broke up with me. i want to be with the guy i am with right now, give him a real chance, and have a break from the ex boyfriend for a while, but about once every two weeks i have these days where i have break downs emotionally over the ex. it's really like someone died in my life and i have never lost by death someone this close to me before. i actually had to get a counselor for this. they say some things take time. but when these days hit i feel like even they don't understand that i just can't wait to get over this because it hurts so much (grief has more to do with losing the friend he was to me). does anyone have ideas to help me with this? i'm just so tired of hurting, not mad i care about him this much, just don't want to hurt.How to deal with a break-up?
i find smoking a joint helps!-but its not for everyone.How to deal with a break-up?
You need to just cherish the good times you had with this guy and move on with your life. It is going to take time and sometimes you never get over them they will always be in the back of your mind so the easy way to deal with this is to think about the good you had together. Start focusing on making yourself better before you start dating someone else. In order for anything to work between you and someone else you first have to be healed and feel like you can move on. Its not bad to be alone for awhile it helps youfind your true self and making decisions about things like this alot easier.